Date Posted: November 23, 2010 - 1:35 am by: Paris
Categories: Madonna

It probably sucks to be the mom of a 24-year old gold-digging manwhore who licks on a 101-year old woman’s crusty crustaceans every night, more so if it was Madonna. Mrs. Vidal is the mom of Madonna’s main toddler slash boy toy and is telling everyone her feelings about her son getting molested by Madonna’s rapey hands, among other things. Via National Enquirer:

“My mouth fell open when I realized that my son was Madonna’s new boyfriend,” said 44-year-old Patricial Vidal. “I’m still trying to come to terms with it.” Her son is professional dancer Brahim Zaibat, 24. He met the 52 year-old Material Girl in September when he performed at the launch of her and daughter Lourdes’ new clothing line in New York. A stunned Patricia says: “Madonna was already a big star when I was a schoolgirl, let alone when Brahim was growing up. The whole situation is very strange.”

Dayum. How can this not change everything? Can you honestly look at your son the same way thinking at the back of your head that he’s banging the Madonna?? Well good job mom, this is what happens when you force-feed him stories of the crypt-keeper as a child.

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Date Posted: June 2, 2010 - 3:28 am by: Paris
Categories: Madonna

Still not completely satisfied with the level of madamism she is at right now, Madonna is planning to give herself a treat by splurging $200,000 on plastic surgery alone on her 52nd birthday.

Celebrity Mania reports:

Daily Star reported Madonna, who recently split from Jesus, is “considering an eye lift, a boob job, lip fillers and Lipo Sculpt but is also opting for less invasive procedures including a new laser treatment that reduces the appearance of spider veins.” Though so, it is said that the “Material Girl” still “wants things to look natural with nothing too radical”.

Between the crypt-keeper and Madonna, you can see more natural beauty in the crypt kreeper, plus the crypt-keeper is probably less creepier and your kids will be a lot safer. Oh wait  a minute, I lost my whole train of thought…oh yeah that’s it, madamism.

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Date Posted: February 12, 2010 - 3:44 am by: Paris
Categories: Madonna

Madonna and Jesus Luz were caught making out in a night club in Rio De Janeiro last night. And I thought these two have broken up already; clearly they weren’t, or if they did split, they’re now back together. Damn. Someone help Jesus get professional help.

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Date Posted: February 5, 2010 - 1:40 am by: Paris
Categories: Madonna

Finally. After quite a while, underwear Jesus Luz came back to his 23-year-old mind, realized that there are hotter chicks in the world and it is gross to be having sex with a woman 14 years older than your mother. Madonna and her boytoy reportedly broke up, as initiated by Jesus. Maybe it was because of the previous reports that Madonna and her ex-boyfriend Alex Rodriguez got back together. But I bet my bottom dollor that what happened was this: Jesus just got in an accident, temporarily lost his mind and eyesight, dated Madonna, and now his senses came back to normal that he puked upon seeing who was in bed with him. And the rest is history.

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Date Posted: January 29, 2010 - 1:13 am by: Paris
Categories: Madonna

We know Madonna is a notorious cougar, but it looks like she’s a woman who’s not easy to get over too. The 51-year-old singer is reportedly back on with his ex, NY Yankee Alex Rodriguez, as the two spent a weekend together at A-Rod’s house in New York. Take note, Madonna is still seeing her latest boytoy, 23-year-old model Jesus Luz.

Interesting. I wonder what these young bachelors see in Madonna, or what Madonna does to them that they kept on coming back for more. So could the rumors be true that Madonna delivers a porn star performance in bed?

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Date Posted: August 20, 2009 - 5:33 am by: Paris
Categories: Madonna

Yes, it’s been a lot of years that Madonna has been in the biz, and yet there are no signs that she’s going to retire soon. Yes, many more years of a singing, dancing Madonna in her panties. Not a good sight, I tell you but she’s gonna be here a long time I can tell. Hmm… Why do I have this feeling that Madonna’s not human? Well, anyway, here are some of Madonna’s candid vacation pics in Italy with her boytoy Jesus Luz.

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Date Posted: November 12, 2008 - 12:58 am by: Bashcab
Categories: Guy Ritchie, Madonna

Here is proof that Madonna has gone absolutely crazy.  Check out the list of impossible rules that she wants Guy Ritchie to follow during his reunion with their kids, courtesy of The Daily Mail.  Now we all know that Madonna thinks the whole world revolves around her.  I mean, damn, don’t let the kids wear clothes with man-made fibers?  Or let them play with toys that are spiritually or ethically unsound?  And apparently, Madonna doesn’t want the kids to watch anything on the TV or read anything except the English Rose books that she wrote herself.  No wonder the kids were so happy when they were photographed with their dad.  Uh-oh, that’s breaking the rules Guy.  Prepare to face the wrath of Madonna.

And excuse me for saying this, but isn’t she the same Madonna that no more than 15 years ago was sucking c*ck and running around naked in front of the camera?  When the hell did she become so uptight?  Oh well, at least we still have the Madonna porn pics to reminisce about right here.


Date Posted: October 30, 2008 - 12:01 am by: Bashcab
Categories: Guy Ritchie, Madonna

Since the couple went public and exchanged verbal barbs against each other, we’ve been getting a lot of reports detailing the hellish marriage that their union has become.  Sources said that Madonna has written a contract detailing marriage rules after the couple saw marriage counselors two years ago.  According to The Sun UK:

“The document detailed how many dates the couple should go on and how often they should have sex.  It stated that Guy had to “work to enrich his wife’s emotional and spiritual well-being” and ordered hom to devote several hours a week to reading Kabbalah texts with Madge.
It even had instructions on what words Guy should use during rows “to resolve conflicts in a constructive way.”
Guy, 40, was instructed never to shout at Madge, 50, but instead look her in the eye and say “I understand that my actions have upset you, please work with me to resolve this.”
The marriage rules said both parties must “devote time to our sexual expressiveness” and “not use sex as a stick to beat one another.”
Sources said Madonna pinned the contract up in their New York home after they saw marriage counselors two years ago, and would just say to her husband, “Contract, Guy, contract” if he broke the rules.”

WTF?!  The rules look like they were written for someone with serious psychological issues.  Looking at Madonna and reading up on some of the latest scoop on her, I’m not surprised to find out about this.  Those lucky marriage counselors probably made a ton of money telling the couple this load of bull****.

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