Date Posted: October 8, 2010 - 1:35 am by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

When we all heard of Tila Tequila’ sextape, we all rolled our eyes at the back of our heads and swung our head from left to right ‘coz we all know this is just some famewhoring to the highest level! Well it turns out we’re not the only one, apparently the judge who handled the Tila Tequila sextape lawsuit the gremlin whore filed to ‘stop the leak’ thinks the same thing. Via TMZ:

“Tila’s lawyer, Alan Gutman, just asked an L.A. County Superior Court judge for an injunction, prohibiting the release of one of her sex tapes. Gutman argued the tape — shot more than 7 years ago during a trip with her boyfriend — was an invasion of privacy and a misappropriation of her image.

But the judge scoffed, saying privacy, schmivacy: “Tila exploits her sexuality.”

Well clearly, the judge hasn’t been around in the game for too long, since everybody knows Tila done molested, ass-raped and exploited the word exploit! This is some viral gremlin monstrosity that can only be vanished by a whole army of orcs!

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Date Posted: August 20, 2010 - 2:09 am by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

Well here’s something to make your day. If you hate the asian leprechaun whore that is Tila Tequila, then sit around and read on because I got some food for the soul for you guys. Tila Tequila’s tits attended The Gathering of The Juggaloos yesterday, and Tila being Tila performed onstage topless. You’d think these Juggaloos would be entertained to see a gremlin with a rack double the size of her face but instead of throwing whistles and cheers, the crowd went apeshit and became a mob of violent gremlin haters, attacking her with huge rocks and fire crackers and, well, human poo even. Why not?

Tila told TMZ a PVO detail of what happened saying that before she evn got onstage, the Juggaloos were hauling huge stone rocks in her face, practically making  it sound like she’s the second coming of Magdalene, except that Magdalene probably had more class that this vapid whore. She also went on to queef that the mob was trying to kill her and threw firecrackers in her face adding, “they almost got me so they finally reach the trailor, blood all over myself, cant stop bleeding, then all of a sudden, all 2 thousand people surround the trailor and busts the windows!!! Even the guys INSIDE with me were shaking! Their hands were shaking cuz they were so scared! So 3 guys inside the trailor had to grab a table and push it over the broken windows and grabbed all the chairs they could find so hold the people from outside back. It was scary as hell!” Geezus…you’d know your singing talent sucks balls when even Juggaloos want to silence the shit out of you.

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Date Posted: August 5, 2010 - 9:53 pm by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

The asian midget whore named Tila Tequila took a break from sucking someone’s dick  for moolah to deny the latest rumor that a Tila Tequila Sextape exists. She went on and ass-raped her keyboard when she took to her blog and said, “”I finally got online and saw that there are FALSE RUMORS that I made a deal for a SEX TAPE! Which is BULL***T!!” She claims she knows who that person was who spread the fakery and stated that it was a guy who used to work for OMG but got fired for bad behavior.

The nymphette claims that she’s already in talks with her lawyer and they’re already filing a restraining order against this person, threatening him that she will spill all the dirty deeds he’s done to her if he doesn’t stop this shit. Okay, let’s all get real here for a second. This is Tila Fuckin Tequila we’re talking about here. She would allow herself to be dry-humped by a pack of gerbils and show it on her webcam on her website just to be noticed so, I’m thinking she made a sextape with the person who’s spreading the rumors. I wonder if it’s Michael Lohan. Given that mighty douchebag’s track record, I wouldn’t be surprised.

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Date Posted: June 18, 2010 - 2:16 am by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

In a pathetic attempt to hoard attention and/or pity from the public, the vapid whore gremlin known as Tila Tequila crawled from under the bridge to parade her “cuts” that pretty much looked like she tried to rape a cat but it struggled and got away from her. This just shows that too much whoring can be boring. Not even Tila Tequila’s tits can save her extinct career now.

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Date Posted: May 31, 2010 - 3:14 am by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

To the two of you who cares, last week Tila Tequila’s tits were reported to join Celebrity Rehab because the producers think it would make the show more interesting if they threw in a troll with big tits who loved munching on ecstasy. Yep, ecstasy. Color me fuckin’ surprised.

Radar reports:

Another source close to the star of A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila told RadarOnline.com that Tila liked to do Ecstacy with then-fiancée Casey Johnson during their short-lived relationship, and they often got high together.

“The night they first went public together on the red carpet, they were both high on E (ecstasy),” the source told RadarOnline.com.

“Casey only did drugs around Tila.” Ecstasy is a love drug that club kids have used since the 90s.

While there may be a 50-50 chance that Tila Tequila may recover from her ecstasy addiction, sadly there is nothing anyone can do about this vapid gremlin’s addiction for attention which is beyond terminal stage.

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Date Posted: May 26, 2010 - 2:39 am by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

It’s about. Fuckin. Time.

The vapid asian troll/gremlin other known as Tila Tequila is reportedly joining the next season of Celebrity Rehab but according to VH1 her chances of improving herself to be a better gremlin might not happen if the producers don’t find enough troubled celebwhores to throw in the wagon.

TMZ reports:

Tila Tequila is finally seeking professional help — TMZ has confirmed nthrough multiple sources that the bisexual reality star has committed to do the next season of VH1’s “Celebrity Rehab” … if it doesn’t get canceled first.

It’s unclear what personal demon Tila will try to conquer with the help of Dr. Drew — but it certainly won’t be her addiction to attention.

But there’s one major catch — as we previously reported — VH1 is having problems finding other “celebrities” to rehabilitate … and if they don’t find a cast quick, the show could be killed. So far, no word on who else the show has its sights set on.

I don’t find any reason for this fuckery to not push through. You can find more troubled people in Hollywood than any menstal institute and while we’re at it let me be the first to suggest Heidi Montag to be thrown in this freak show. I’m envisioning a pretty crazy feud about to happen and we can bet one who will totally make it, that is if these two twats don’t kill each other til the end of the show.

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Date Posted: April 17, 2010 - 3:00 am by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

Here’s Tila Tequila doing something socially relevant for the first time in her life–stripping and pole dancing. Well, I’m only saying “first time” to give emphasis to “socially relevant” because clearly, Tila isn’t a virgin to these clubs anymore. I guess it’s just fair she used to work as a stripper, or a hooker, maybe, because she landed on her 15 minutes of fame in Hollywood. Well, anyway, here she was pole-dancing at the Crazy Horse strip club in the Bronx.

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Date Posted: February 17, 2010 - 2:00 am by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

Tila Tequila had a miscarriage. At least that’s what we wants us to believe, to complete her publicity stunt of a fake pregnancy. If you remember, last month or so, Tila has been tweeting about her supposed pregnancy, and even shopping for toys (but really she’s just fake posing for the paparazzi). Now, over at Twitter a few days back, Tila announced that she had an accident, and that she had concussions in the head and had a metal chair fall on her belly. Thus leading to a… wait for it… a miscarriage. Why am I not surprised?

Seriously. Someone take this chick to a mental hospital.

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Date Posted: February 2, 2010 - 1:35 am by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

Tila Tequila wasted the time of the paparazzi present at Kitson for Kids the other day by doing her usual staged poses and pretending it was all candid. She was shopping for toys because she really wants us to believe she’s pregnant and it all isn’t just a publicity stunt. Oh, we will, eventually. And if she really is pregnant, we all know what to do. Call child services, that is. Somebody help the poor baby.

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Date Posted: January 27, 2010 - 1:50 am by: Paris
Categories: Tila Tequila

Sorry to fill your screens with nonsense, but this was what Tila Tequila wrote on her blog last night:

THE BIG NEWS EVERYONE: TILA TEQUILA IS OFFICALLY PREGNANT, 100% CONFIRMED!!!!!!!!!!!!!! & THIS BABY WAS NO “ACCIDENT” EITHER!!!!!!!!

We all agree that Asian chick is a famewhore, right? So it’s just safe to assume that when she said she’s “100% pregnant” in her blog, she was just actually making another plea for attention. Well, she has tried it all, from staged nip slips to milking her late fiancee’s death (I even doubt that her engagement to Casey Johnson was even real), Tila has pathetically resorted to all antics just to get the amount of attention she wants, which she has yet to achieve. And she’ll get it, maybe… never?

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