Date Posted: December 7, 2010 - 12:41 am by: Paris
Categories: Chelsea Handler

Well it looks like the things that are comin’ out of Chelsea Handler’s mouth is as dirty as the things comin’ in. At a stand-up show in New Jersey, she appeared to be possessed  by the spirit of Jennifer Aniston where she called Angelina Jolie a wife stealer and a punani, among other things. Via Blemish:

“She’s a homewrecker, she is. She can rescue as many babies from as many countries as she wants to. I don’t f***ing believe you. She gives interviews, ‘I don’t have a lot of female friends.’ Cause you’re a f**king c**t … you’re a f***ing b***h.”

Funny how someone who got the fame from sleeping with a producer to get a show and releasing a sextape(which by the way damaged my retina) has the audacity to call Angelina Jolie a cunt and a bitch among other things. She should stick to what she knows best, like I don’t know, what does this old hag do again?

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Date Posted: November 18, 2010 - 1:16 am by: Paris
Categories: Kim Kardashian

The Governer of Alaska, Sarah Palin, was supposed to be on the cover of PEOPLE magazine but reports say Kim Kardashian snagged the cover despite the photographer’s efforts on Sarah Palin’s photoshoot and the fact that the Governer hottie was on the mag to promote her show, Sarah Palin’s Alaska. Via Blemish:

“Palin had been penciled in as a possible cover with an exclusive interview to promote her TLC show, “Sarah Palin’s Alaska.” “Kim didn’t know she was going to be the cover this week,” a source said. “She only did the interview at an event with the magazine just days earlier.” Palin’s six-page spread was photographed by Michael O’Neill, who flew up to Alaska, while Kardashian’s pictures were pick-ups.”

I was gonna suggest maybe they could put the two girls on the cover, since they’re both pretty hot anyway but then I realized that probably won’t work since Kim Kardashian’s ass is just gonna eat up Sarah Palin’s space. I don’t think there’s a tool created in Photoshop for that ass.

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Date Posted: November 18, 2010 - 1:01 am by: Paris
Categories: Eva Longoria Parker

Following reports that Eva Longoria and Tony Parker is in talks of divorce, latest reports are confirming what I have speculated in the first place, a third party! Though…I messed up on who fucked up who. Turns out Tony Parker has been cheating on Eva Longoria’s ass on get this–on his former Spurs teammate’s wife! Via Huffington Post:

“The other woman is Erin Barry, the wife of Tony’s former Spurs teammate Brent Barry, according to Sports Illustrated writer Bryan Armen Graham. “Have it on good authority from entertainment sources that “former teammate” in Tony Parker-Eva Longoria affair is Brent Barry,” Graham tweeted.”

Get the Kardashians off the fuckin’ network, this shit is more reality show-material! I slipped in a pic of the alleged homewrecker and Tony, dude, it’s like I don’t know you anymore! You cheat on your wife with a chick that looks like your wife! That’s messed up.

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Date Posted: November 16, 2010 - 1:03 am by: Paris
Categories: Courtney Love

Courtney Love thinks she’s still desirable and she wants to prove the world she still can bag any man. Maybe not for her charms. but for her money. Courtney is reportedly dropping some G’s for a date with dark-featured hottie Adrien Brody at a fund-raising event. Woe is Adrien. Via New York post:

Has Courtney Love set her sights on a new man? Despite recently complaining of money woes, she bid a whopping $17,000 for tea with Oscar winner Adrien Brody at Paul Haggis’ Artists for Peace and Justice fund-raiser for Haitian schools Friday night. Spies said Love got into a fierce bidding war with Gerard Butler over Brody at the bash, which also marked the opening of restaurant Salon Millesime at the Carlton Hotel on Madison Avenue.

You gotta love the effort done by Gerard Butler trying to save his buddy from this monstrosity. I know sometimes tragedy happens when you least expect it but geezus! Courtney fuckin’ Love?? If I was Adrien’s buddy, the least I can do is to set him for an advanced earliest possible appointment at the free clinic.

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Date Posted: November 16, 2010 - 12:58 am by: Paris
Categories: Emma Watson

The British young hottie named Emma Watson who stars in Harry Potter movies as Hermione Granger doesn’t have any problems fitting in her new second home, the US where she’s currently trying to finish her major. Everybody loves Emma, well, maybe a little too much. Reports say there are photos of Emma Watson topless in the bathroom being circulated around campus via email and she is not amused at all. Via New York Daily News:

“Topless photos of the 20-year-old actress, who plays Hermione Granger in the successful film franchise, are making the rounds among students via e-mail, according to the Daily Mail. The photos in question allegedly show the actress wearing only a towel around her waist standing next to a hot tub.

“Emma is trying to seek out the source so she can put a stop to it,” a friend told the paper. “She says the picture has been faked.”

Now don’t get me wrong, as much as I got the hots for Emma Watson, I’m totally not aching for the fake photos. It’s obvious someone as classy as her won’t be posing naked in a bathroom. I would imagine she’d do it in a bed of gold coins or in a room of elegant and expensive china ware. That being said, don’t mess with my fantasy!

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Date Posted: November 11, 2010 - 2:10 am by: Paris
Categories: Demi Lovato

Apparently, Wilmer Valderrama’s chick scope isn’t limited to cokewhores and pussy flashers, he’s into Disney chicks too who checks themselves into rehab for coke and smashing a bitch’s face. Reports say that Wilmer is hitting Demi Lovato’s ass. Dayum, this guy is slick! Page Six reports:

“The two started seeing each other in May right after her breakup with Jonas,” a source on the tour said. “She would show us pictures of them together.” Another source said Valderrama has been a big part of Lovato’s life leading right up to her decision to seek treatment.

Okay I got to admit Wilmer Valderrama used to be my hero. Are you kidding me? A dude with a track record of humping under-aged starlets and not getting his ass to jail must make you a god. But seriously man, this is 2010 already and you’re 30. This is getting kinda creepy already.

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Date Posted: November 7, 2010 - 11:44 pm by: Paris
Categories: Kat Dennings

After Jessica Alba’s pregnant tits, here’s another celebitch throwing her awesome goodies in the internet for horny motherfuckers like us to drool and fap off to. You may remember this chick from the movie House Bunny and The 40-year old virgin but now we know what we’ll remember her for.

Seriously…dayumm! Take a good look at her funbags for a minute and you’ll remember it for life. You can spot those Kat Denning’s tits in a dark room or at a crowded market place in India and if we’re lucky, on my 30th birthday party in my mom’s basement.

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Date Posted: November 4, 2010 - 11:48 pm by: Paris
Categories: Uncategorized

Ahhh…finally! After a long time, we get to see another celebrity leaked naked pics! This time, it’s not your regular celebwhore, it’s Zooey Deschanel! If you’re a cheesy motherfucker like me who likes sappy movies, you’ll remember her from 500 days of Summer as the chick who fucked that guy from Inception and dumped him to move on to another dick.

I always wondered what she looked like topless, but looks like we got something even better! These are the alleged screenshots from her naked video which she sent to a boyfriend ten years back. Christmas came early this year fellas! Fap away over these Zooey Deschanel naked pics!

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Date Posted: November 4, 2010 - 11:38 pm by: Paris
Categories: LeAnn Rimes

Because a husband stealer like LeAnn Rimes respects the sanctity of marriage, reports are saying the blonde hoe is now engaged with her actor boyfriend Eddie Cibrian. Damn, the punani must be THAT great! Via E! NEws:

“Though it didn’t happen on Halloween, the recently divorced actor indeed popped the question recently and the duo are engaged, a source tells E! News. So no wonder Brandi Glanville wants to have a civil sit-down with her kids’ future stepmom…” Glanville, who has two children with Cibrian, told E! News today that she planned to meet with her sworn enemy pal-in-the-making next week.”

Apparently, Douchebag Cibrian’s ex wife is queefing that she’s planning to meet up with LeAnn Rimes’ homewrecker ass to who know why and I’m also not sure if the police are going to be in the wings when this shit happens. I don’t know Brandi personally but if she and I have the same IQ level, I’d slap the squinty out of LeAnn’s eyes to set the bitch straight. Just sayin’!

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Date Posted: October 28, 2010 - 1:03 am by: Paris
Categories: Olivia Munn

Justin Timberlake took a break from getting strap-on dildoed in the ass by Jessica Biel to boink Olivia Munn. Reports are saying Olivia didn’t want to bump privates with Justin as long as he’s still with Jessica which led him to give her the typical ‘naw, we broke up’ sign. Via Us Weekly:

Believing he had left Biel and that her relationship with Timberlake might develop into something serious, Munn took him to her hotel, the Gansevoort Park Avenue NYC, Sept. 27 and 28, where “they were openly affectionate,” the insider adds. The insider tells Us the two “had amazing sex” that night.

Well seriously, I’m surprised on how much I don’t care about the fucky times these two twats had. What I want to know is how Jessica Biel will bust Olivia Munn’s ass with her biceps! I think these two should settle this in the best way possible. I’m thinking clothes off in a mud fight arena with dildoes, or am I being too subtle?

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